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Papan's Landing Senior Center

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            A Cheerful heart is good medicine. Prov.17:22

                    12 Ways to be Cantankerous

1. Decide you're tired of keeping it all in , and from now on you're going to tell everyone how you really feel. Then Tell'em.

2. If it walks, talks, or moves, blame it.

3. In the company of your adult children, repeat no family story less than 50 years old, preferable one that illustrates how insightful boors you grew up with.

4. To any advice you know you should take but you don't want to hear, simply say, " You just don't understand", and stand your ground . Adamantly.

5. If it walks like a duck, looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, call it an orangutan and insist you're right. Adamantly.

6. Don't let the fact you haven't heard the question stop you from answering it in no uncertain terms.

7. Sometime during every family celebration, announce that you probably won't be around for the next one, then gaze wistfully into the distance.

8. In the presence of your visitors, complain that you never have any visitors.

9. Within ear shot of the person who drive you to and from your doctors' appointments, inform others that no on ever does anything for you.

10. Never settle for simple request when an angry rant will do.

11. When you receive a gift, put it away and explain to the sender that you're "saving it for good."

12. If they don't laugh at your jokes, it's because they don't have a sense of humor, and it's high time you point this out ( see tip#1).